Today I was looking through old year books and thinking about old friends, more specifically old boyfriends. I have talked in the past about girl friends that I have had in my life, but today, I am thinking about old boyfriends. Kirby and I married right out of college, so these are young men that were a part of my life in high school and early college.
I was never one of those girls that “played the field”. I tended to latch on to boys that showed an interest. That often scared off some boys pretty quickly, including Kirby for awhile. It also caused my heart to be broken many times, by many different young men. But I always wonder how their perspective differed from mine. Communication and dating are both so challenging, I wonder how their side of the story would be different from mine, especially after so many years.
My very first date was when I was a sophomore in high school. Yes, I was a late bloomer and very shy. We only had a couple dates, then stopped seeing each other. When we saw each other at a high school reunion, we talked about why we broke up. It was one of those conversations that I never thought I would have the joy of having. His memory was that I ended it, mine was that he did. We laughed about how things happened, about one of those “he said, she said” conversations that ended a relationship. We had flirted throughout the remainder of high school, but never went out again. We were both afraid of getting hurt.
There are so many times in our lives that relationships can change or even end over a misunderstanding. Our perspective, our experiences or lack of experiences, plays into everything we hear, say and do. In the situation I just mentioned, I was young and shy, and really had no experience talking with a boy. The relationship had an impact on me though, and I am very glad that we got to talk again, even though it was 30 years later.
Today, I will spend some more time thinking about all those people that wondered through my life and left their footprints. I will remember the way they helped to shape the person I am today. I will pray that they are all happy and healthy. And I will thank God for bringing them into my life.
Life can be such a funny game. We share time with others, but can never really know their perspective of the relationship. Please help us to remember how what we say and do can have such a big impact on the lives of those around us. Help us to be better friends, spouses, parents and caregivers. Help us to share our life in a way that improves the lives of those around us. Please forgive us when we don’t do that as well as we should.